Why Mummy Doesn’t Give a ****! by Gill Sims / Blog Tour

Why Mummy Doesn’t Give a ****! by Gill Sims

 

cover156090-mediumPublisher: Harper Collins

Publishing Date: 27th June 2019

Source:  Received from the publisher in return for an honest review, thank you!

Number of pages: 352

Genre: General Fiction (Adult)

 Buy the Book:  Kindle | Hardcover )

 

Synopsis:

I’m wondering how many more f*cking ‘phases’ I have to endure before my children become civilised and functioning members of society? It seems like people have been telling me ‘it’s just a phase!’ for the last fifteen bloody years. Not sleeping through the night is ‘just a phase.’ Potty training and the associated accidents ‘is just a phase’. The tantrums of the terrible twos are ‘just a phase’. The picky eating, the back chat, the obsessions. The toddler refusals to nap, the teenage inability to leave their beds before 1pm without a rocket being put up their arse. The endless singing of Frozen songs, the dabbing, the weeks where apparently making them wear pants was akin to child torture. All ‘just phases!’ When do the ‘phases’ end though? WHEN?

Mummy dreams of a quirky rural cottage with roses around the door and chatty chickens in the garden. Life, as ever, is not going quite as she planned. Paxo, Oxo and Bisto turn out to be highly rambunctious, rather than merely chatty, and the roses have jaggy thorns. Her precious moppets are now giant teenagers, and instead of wittering at her about who would win in a fight – a dragon badger or a ninja horse – they are Snapchatting the night away, stropping around the tiny cottage and communicating mainly in grunts – except when they are demanding Ellen provides taxi services in the small hours. And there is never, but never, any milk in the house. At least the one thing they can all agree on is that rescued Barry the Wolfdog may indeed be The Ugliest Dog in the World, but he is also the loveliest.

Rating: five-stars

 

I’m so happy to say that Ellen is back, with another year full of trials, tribulations, surprises and troubles. Jane is now fifteen years old, spending her days of her cell phone, going to parties, living and breathing make – up and feeling embarrassed by her mother. Peter is thirteen and he spends his days playing video games and eating all the food he can find in the fridge. Simon… well, Simon is actually not there. Ellen and Simon are divorced now. Ellen and the children have moved to the cottage of her dreams (almost. Except for the damp, the single bathroom and no roses by the door). So it’s not wonder that mummy not only drinks too much, swears too much but also doesn’t give a ****, right?

Oh holy moly, how to write a review for this book to do it a justice? Impossible task, I’d say.

The third (and I pray to God, not the last one!) part of the series by Gill Sims deals with the stress of coping with teenage children. I know, we all think that first it’s infancy, then the terrible two, then pre – adolescence etc that is the worst what can happen, so let’s agree on the fact that all of those phases are simply stressful. Putting it mildly. I may be not in Ellen’s shoes yet but I can’t sleep and need a whisky only when I think about my daughter reaching puberty, thinking I have all this to come. So it really rang a bell, this book. And was a kind of warning.

This is a raw and brutally honest picture of being a parent. Sweary and normal. Realistic, even if the situations are a bit exaggerated (or not?). The author doesn’t beat around the bush and she deserves a standing ovation for this – telling how it is, not afraid to use crude language and a lot of drinking but this is what I have expected and wanted from this book. She also intermingles the hilarity and humour with some brief moments of seriousness, adding depth to the light tone.

I am still in love with Ellen and I want to have her confidence. She is full of flaws (who isn’t) and swears a lot (who doesn’t) and has a great way around her children, handling them in open way. And the children’s antics are hilarious, their attitudes are so real. And they have their moments. And Ellen deals with them. But they really feel grown up, the children, and I like that the author keeps on top of it and let her characters grow up and mature. I love Ellen’s sense of humour, her attitude, the way she sees and describes things and that she’s not afraid to tell how it is. I, on the other hand, should probably get a special prize for all the things I didn’t say and that should be said. Ellen is so relatable with the way she is, with her worries, hopes and desperation. The author has done an excellent job in bringing her characters’ personalities to the pages, and I think they all are going to appeal to all kinds of the audience.

It was easy, quick and funny read that made me feel normal. There were moments that I rolled my eyes and nodded at things that could so happen to me. I would probably go that far and say that it is the best yet – it made me laugh out loud and cry in the next moment. Gill Sims is not only a champion of writing humorous, hilarious scenes, but she also deals with the sad and poignant ones in a gentle, understanding way, and the book does feel a little more serious and mature in tone, even though, of course, the hysterical finny is still there. It’s a book that I really needed in my life now, and I can’t recommend it highly enough!

 

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Why Mummy Swears by Gill Sims

Why Mummy Swears by Gill Sims

 

38746264Publisher: Harper Collins

Publishing Date: 12th July 2018

Source:  Received from the publisher in return for an honest review, thank you!

Number of pages: 368

Genre: Non – Fiction, Humour

 Buy the Book:  Kindle | Hardcover

 

 

 

 

Synopsis:

Why Mummy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mummy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane.

It’s every parents’ nightmare – the start of the school holidays – and instead of sitting in the sun, reading a book over a cold, crisp glass of Pinot Grigio, Mummy has two bored moppets to attend to. After frantically booking sports camps, child minder slots, not to mention time off work, Mummy is exhausted. But this is only the beginning…

After being dragged to join the school’s PTA in the new term by an annoyingly kind-spirited neighbour, Mummy is stuck with organising the Christmas Fayre and pleasing all the overly disapproving parents. In combination with getting to know her father’s surprise new glamorous (and much younger) wife, and being forced to spend more time with her narcissistic mother, life isn’t cutting her much of a break. What more could possibly happen?

Rating: five-stars

 

but I needmy girls!

“Why Mummy Swears” covers a year in Ellen and her family’s lives, starting in July and with school holidays and ending the following July. And ah feck it, guys. This is probably one of the hardest reviews to write because well, I simply loved everything in this book and about this book. Everything. So there. And now I’m going to immediately order Gill Sim’s first book “Why Mummy Drinks” because I know that I’m also fecking going to love it. If it’s only half as brilliantly funny as “Why Mummy Swears” than I’ve already won.

The best thing about this book was that it was so relatable. From the very first page I couldn’t stop but roar with laughter at all the similarities between the characters in the book and me and my husband, who also doesn’t understand that spices are only good when they’re out of date (I’m not even sure if there is the best before label on spices, as they live for ever) and that out of date doesn’t start one minute after midnight. And it is only the first thing that comes to mind, and there were tons of them. Ellen has only the balls the say what she thinks and to actually pack the kids and take them for holidays while I sit here and only fill the money – box that I’ve received with my review copy. It’s full. Almost.

The things that happen in Ellen’s life are mostly hilarious but they are also very realistic and this is brilliant – it could be easily overdone but it’s simply perfect and possible to happen. You can’t help but laugh out loud at the way the characters act and react, roll your eyes or simply nod your head in agreement. I only pray to God that my daughter won’t turn into Jane. Who was incredibly clever, by the way, probably too clever.

The writing is addictive and so easy to follow – I couldn’t, and didn’t want, to put the book away for a single moment. The way it was written – as a diary – was the best possible way in my opinion. This reminded me a little of Bridget Jones, of course, and there is absolutely room for more books to come.
This book tells how it really is in a perfect tone, not too patronizing, not too aggressive, and it gives hope, and really guys, I feel better after reading it. It turns out that I’m not the only one who can’t cope with everything, who swears under her nose, who leaves the dishes in the sink over night, whose husband goes only on holidays when there is breakfast buffet.

“Why Mummy Swears” was a hilarious, uplifting read that I easily could identify with. The fun and humour poured from every word and this is what I really needed. It was brutally honest in telling how it is to be a part of a family, to have a family. It was light, it was bright, it was refreshing and full of painful truth of being a parent. Simply, it must be one of the best books I have ever read – and it’s saying something as I’ve read many books. Many. Highly recommended!